I've lived in the bay area for over 5 years and my first encounter with the "Stranger in the aisle" was almost 5 years ago. There have been regular encounters since. Many of the times i've slipped away, but on an equal number of occasions they've managed to extract my phone number (im not a very rude person). Heres a typical conversation between "The stranger" and me.
Cast: "Stranger" (possibly with wife and kids). Well dressed in late early to mid 30's
and me.
Scene: Aisle in "Walmart", "Best buy", or "Borders"
Stranger: Excuse me, Can you tell me which of these (something) is better.
Me: Hmmm. im not sure
(what they mean: sweet, a naive indian sucker who i can give my pitch)
(what i mean: shoot, another one of those bitches)
Stranger: Wow, there are so many products , its diffcult to pick one.
Me: I agree.
(what they mean: Conversation filler, need to get ahead soon)
(what i mean: ok bitch, i need to get out of here)
Stranger: By the way, Im (indian name) and this is my wife (typical indian name)
Me: Im Manish
(what they mean: nothing)
(what i mean: shit, look for exit soon)
Stranger: What part of india are you from
Me: Bombay
(what they mean: just getting friendly before the pitch begins)
(what i mean: I'm doomed to get the pitch again)
Stranger: so are, you Marathi, Gujarati .. or ?
Me: I'm Sindhi
(what they mean: just getting friendly before the pitch begins)
(what i mean: I'm doomed to get the pitch again)
Stranger: Do you work here ?
Me: Yeah, im a programmer
(what they mean: If he's in hi tech, ive got my catch of the evening)
(what i mean: Yeah bitch, lets start the pitch now, so i can go)
Stranger: So is that your long term plan. like programming and hi tech ?
Me: yeah, i really havent though that far out
(what they mean: building up the pitch)
(what i mean: i dont feel obliged to tell a cheesy asshole what my plans are for tonite, let alone long term)
Stranger: You know, im in Hi tech too, but i have a business on the side. Im building it while keeping my full time job. Just a secondary income to help keep up with the growing costs of living in this area.
Me: Oh yeah. Thats great.
(what they mean: i got sucked into it and now ive gotto do this)
(what i mean: you got screwed dude)
Stranger: Im looking for some young people to join me
Me: Interesting
(what they mean: My uplines are sucking $250 from my ass each month and giving me $5 in rewards. I want someone to share that pain with me)
(what i mean: im loving the look on his face)
Stranger: Theres great potential to make 4 figure incomes each month
Me: Wow, thats a lot of money.
(what they mean: But.. but.. thats what they told me !!)
(what i mean: yeah, if you had a secondary 4 figure income, you'd be shopping at crate and barrel)
Stranger: And you can do this all on the side while having a full time job
Me: cool
(what they mean: plus you have to look for prey in aisles of stores and sell detergent and vitamins to neighbors)
(what i mean: dude, i havent got a degree to sell detergent and vitamins to neighbors)
Stranger: You know with the current economy it doesnt hurt to have some income security
Me: thats true
(what they mean: poeple always need detergent and vitamins)
(what i mean: dude, are we done yet)
Stranger: Anyways, nice meeting you, is there a way i can reach you sometime
Me: yeah .. heres my number and email
(what they mean: gotcha)
(what i mean: shoot)
Stranger: heres my business card
Me: Oh thanks
(what they mean: gotcha gotcha)
(what i mean: dude, this is going to the trash)
So all you guys prowling the aisles, please revise your technique. You think the book you read gave you exclusive tips on how to rope in naive indians into your pyramid marketing scam. No. Ive been approached by a dozen guys with the same conversation before. and the moment you ask me a silly question about a product, i know you are bullshitting me. And when im smiling at you, im really laughing.
Im laughng because you are stupid enough to have bought in to the idea by some other stranger in the aisle. You are now one of the evil aisle wanderers who always have an empty shopping cart or none at all. and when you ask about some apple corer, or kitchen peeler, you are proclaiming your stupidity. The guys who made fools out of thousands of you, are sitting at the top and sucking money out of you, selling tapes and books with ideas on how to catch other people in the aisles or supermarkets and convince them to buy in. You are peddling their vicious plan in the hopes of making a 4 figure income while they are already making 6 figure incomes by selling you detergent and vitamins.
